Sunday, January 22, 2012

Tainan mom has gone to the other shore



This is a photo of Jean's maiden family reunion taken in 2007. Mom in the centre, Qian ge (Qian is our eldest brother), Jean and Zhe mei are to her right hand side; Gan ge, Shi jie and eldest sister-in-law to her left. Apparently, Jian mei was the photographer. Mom was then at the age of 85.

At 11:40 am of 21/01/2012, (6:40 am Hong Kong time), Jean’s youngest sister, Zhe, called us from Hong Kong to notify the death of our Tainan mom who at 4:00 am of Taiwan time, finally repaid her Karma and was able to drop the load of all of the various encounters good or bad to her perception in this world, and left for the other shore which we hope is The World Extreme Blissfulness in the West.

I and my wife refer to her as our “Tainan mom” in distinguish her from “Taipei mom” which was referred to mother of my side because Tainan mom lived in Tainan City and Taipei mom was in Taipei.

Tainan mom was sent to hospital in July 2010 due to a fell and consequently suffered from brain stroke that made her bedridden and had never been able to live without some life support devises and 24 hours medical care since then. During this period of her hospitalization, the modern medical technology had made her alive from the appearance, however, to her children and to mom herself, the regular daily phlem sucking was a horrible experience, as the children saw their beloved mom wailing out of horror.

Mom was the only daughter of a well-off farming family, born in 1922. She had a nature of kindness since she was a small child. Mom’s name was Chen Xin Hu, 陳心壺. Not so tall but with a beautiful face that always radiated compassionate smile. Everyday in the morning, she would carry a big load of vegetable produce from their village to the market and accompanied her grandmother selling those produce. Because of her overly tanned skin, her nickname was "the little black beauty".

When dad was told of his grandpa's intent of matching him with that black beauty, he became uneasy every time when he came home after school and passed through the room where grandpa's literacy class was undergoing. He always bowed his upper body and sort of sneaked into his room. Mum later recalled her impression of dad before their marriage, saying "he looked like a skinny mouse, with glasses sitting across his nose, trying to escape the surveillance of a cat in our classroom."

After dad had finished his study at Fuzhou Industrial Institute, he worked for China Petroleum Company in Fujian office as Chemical engineer. Then, following his parents' will, he married to "the little black beauty" in 1943. Then, in 1945, right after Japan surrendered and returned Taiwan to China’s ruling, dad’s company sent his team to take over the management of its petroleum fuel production, so this young couple unexpectedly took dad's younger brother and their first child, Qian, left their hometown, Fuzhou, came and settled down in Taiwan for the rest of their life.

Mother's compassion can be found in the following few stories.

There was a man wondering about our village every day during early 1960’S. He was schizophrenic patient. People living in the village usually shut their doors and would not answer the knocking when he knocked their door to beg for food. Mom reacted differently. She opened the door when she knew that guy began his door knocking for food, she initiatively waved him from a distance to come over, and let him come in to his bowl of noodle served on the dining table. That had been occuring for quite a long period of time till the security guard stationed at the entrance gate of our village stopped from entering to our village.

We adopted a black dog. It happened on one day in late 1960's when dad finished work in Taiwan Sugar Research Institute, he noticed a black dog always followed him from the bus stop all the way till dad entered home. Mom always offered some leftover food to the dog by the door. One day, mom suddenly decided to keep it as a member of the family, and gave it a name of ‘xiao hey’, meaning little black thing. Xiao hey did not disapoint mom, she behaved nicely, and never had she caused any trouble to us. She walked to bus stop everyday and waited to greet dad upon his arrival and they walked home together. She played with us. From its excellent behavior and smart, we believed she was a pet of a well-off family and was later discarded for some reason. In 1978, she became weaker and weaker and died peacefully.

Mom was very religious. Back in Fuzhou before she married to dad, she chanced to be taught with Pure Land Buddhism which advocates that practitioners believe in chanting the ultimate mantra of “Amituofo” will be born in the Extreme Blissful World”. Her temperament was that she would stick to the teaching wholeheartedly if she believed the new things she learned was relating to love and sincerity.

She later became a vegetarian for religious reasons and due to two incidents happened to the family. One day in 1956 after school time, uncle did not return home from school. Not long after mom sensed the abnormality, someone representing the school came to tell mom that uncle was identified as political activist by government authority and had been charged imprisonment for 10 years. Readers who are familiar with what happened during the 228 uprising will understand why uncle encountered this unfortunate incident. Uncle's teacher was proved a spy embedded in Taiwan to collect information for Chinese Communist, and uncle happened to be an outstanding student of this teacher, and was close to him. People charged with this kind scenario were put in jails in an offshore island called Green Island, and many of them were just disappeared and never been seen anymore.

Mom was overwhelmed by the incident. Though she could not do anything, she knew Buddha would help her. She was on normal diet as the majority of people. But she vowed to Buddha that she would from then on observe vegetarian diet through the rest of her life for the repentance of the ill luck that her brother-in-law was charged and for his expedited release, so she prayed.

Uncle was released when his imprisonment was fulfilled in 1966. Then there was another heartbreaking incident fell on the family.
In 1976, Dasou (refers to eldest brother’s wife) gave birth to their second child, Zhiwei. This poor boy was unfortunately attacked by a flu during the first month after labor, and developed high body temperature that seemed not to subdue. Tainan City Hospital doctor diagnosed him with Meningitis and told dad the baby would be definitely disabled when he grew up unless properly treated by bigger hospital in Taipei. This incident of our family was something inspired mom that life is full of impermanence.

Mom sincerely prayed and prayed day and night to Buddha for the healing of Zhiwei. She was and had become an even more strict vegetarian since the second family misfortune. Zhiwei was miraculously given a place by the Women and Children Hospital in Taipei which had strong demand always so it was a bless, and Dad urgently bought an air ticket and rushed the baby to the hospital. After a long process of treatment, Zhiwei returned home a healthy baby till present.

When mom had become frail from her eighties of age, she lived alternately in her two son’s homes. Gan Ge (our second elder brother) employed a Philipino maid called Marlisa to manage their household chores including the tasks of attending mom. Each time Marlisa finished the kitchen chores, she normally waited till Gan Ge’s family finished and then had her lunch on the table. But when it was Gan Ge’s turn to look after mom at their home, mom always insisted that Maria came to lunch on the table together. More ironical thing mom did there was, each time Marlisa was going to mop the floor, mom would compassionately say to her, “ Marlisa, come to sit here for a rest, Ah ma (meaning grandma, referring to herself) will do the moping for you.”

At age 90, she finished her last bit of journey. Last night, Jian e-mailed us the schedule of each of the customary events prior to the funeral cemeony, and by the way she described that mom’s face looked peaceful and the body was flexible, those appearence indicated the soul had settled in decent realm if it was not the Extreme Blissful World. Jean has got the earliest available flight, and will fly to attend the planned 7 sessions of the 7th Realm Lifting rituals aiming at giving mom’s soul a push to assure that the merit gained from the 7th Realm Lifting Rituals will achieve this goal. Amituofo.

Sunday, January 01, 2012

Some thoughts on new year day of 2012

01/01/2012 Sunday.

This is the first day of the new year. What lays ahead is impossible to predict unless you are someone with super natural power. There are quite a lot of people claiming they have this kind of ability, they are called "fortunetellers".

In Taiwan, I believe it is still the same as was 20 years ago when I just left Taiwan, that people of either older or younger, like to consult with the fortunetellers on the new year day about the possible general outcome they will be facing to, or what direction they should be heading to for following one year.

This is a very natural deed people will do when they are under a strong feeling of uncertainty. I did the same thing myself, too. Once, when I was about 29 years old not sure where should I go forward -- giving up the joint venture of our own printing business and resumming as an employee or remaining as I were. The fortuneteller gave me an answer that could be interpreted into either ways, and I chose to be working for others. I believe in the logic which says that everything you did leads you to a certain outcome. But I also believe in fatalism which says that everything happens according to our destination.

So this is new year day of 2012, to me it is just a an ordinary day.