Grandpa ever said so to grandma

Grandpa died at the age of 59, well before I was born, however I have heard quite a lot of his stories from my parents and my eldest cousin, Jinshia who was the most pampered grandchild of my grandma. My mother told me that my grandma always took Jinshia along wherever she went.

Grandpa was born in Taiwan. His father immigrated at age 9, to Taiwan with relatives from Fujian province of China. So my grandpa is the second generation of Chen family in Taiwan. He learned a skill in the carpentry trade after he grew up, and made a fortune in this field. He was appointed as Horshio(保正), equivalent to Justice of the Peace in New Zealand today, by the authority during Japanese ruling of Taiwan.

My overall impression about grandpa is that he is a gentleman. He was popular among his friends. My mother said that whenever he was not working, there were always friends in his office chatting or singing together. Besides feeding a team of about 10 apprentices and able carpenters, he also generously and frequently took his aunties, uncles and his cousins from the country side to stay at our home during the festival events, and provided them accommodation, food and pocket money.

Wealthy people as he was in his day were commonly having concubines, but he was one of the few exceptions. My cousin Jinshia told me that it was not only because our grandma was very beautiful but also because of grandpa’s virtue of respecting others. He respected grandma very much. Jinshia said that as far as she could recall, she never heard grandpa said anything harsh to his wife. His tone in speaking to her always sounded polite and respectful.

In 1968, when the combined cemetery of Chen family was finished with its reconstruction, we all went to the cemetery located on the hill side of Ching Shui to pay our respect and worship to the ancestors. By the entrance of the tomb yard, we saw a woman weeping in great sadness in front of a new tomb. Upon seeing this scenario, my cousin, Jinshia told me that once on the Tomb Sweeping Festival after grandpa had died, she accompanied grandma to the cemetery. On the route toward grandpa’s tomb, they saw a woman crying sadly in front of a tombstone. That reminded grandma of the words grandpa had said to her when he was still alive.

Jinshia said to me with eyes staring far as if she was with grandma on that time at that place, “Grandma told me that once she came to the tomb yard with her husband and saw someone crying sadly in front of a tomb.” She continued. “Grandpa tenderly held grandma’s hands when they saw this, and said to her ‘Yuan, I hope you don’t cry as sad as that woman upon my death as that will make me feel sorry for you.’ And there they passed by that woman rapidly.”

That was how my grandpa treated others. Through Jinshia’s words of mouth, grandpa’s good examples are passed down. And I hope, through this blog, it will be transmitted to my children and their children.